I'm Sorry!!!

So lately I have been thinking and I have come to the realization that Jason is definitely the better half. I know that no one is perfect, but he comes a GREAT DEAL closer than I do. He is such a gentle person. He is patient and kind. He is such a good example of someone who thinks through his thoughts before he expresses them to anyone(a skill I have a ways to go to master). Sometimes it feels like it takes Jason an abnormally long to make decisions, but I am learning that this is a good thing. I would much rather wait a little longer for a good decision and avoid bad ones than just having everything in a short amount of time(does that make sense?). Some of the worst decisions we have made as a couple have been ones I made or ones I rushed him into.

We have received an offer on our house and are supposed to be closing soon(HOORAY!). However, that means that we are now in the process of looking for a house. I know this seems like a lot of fun(and sometimes it is), but with 3 small children in tow and an hour at least to drive to each house it becomes extremely taxing. We have looked at 4 houses this week; thrown 2 out of the running; fallen in love with one; and grown sad because we disagree about some things. I want to say that I LOVE the house we saw yesterday. It is everything I have ever wanted in a house and within our price range. I am trying to come to terms with the fact that I will probably never have that house and I am trying my hardest not to be too emotional over it, but I will need many prayers to accomplish that. You see, that PERFECT HOUSE has an offer already on it and that would rush us into making a decision(which Jason is uncomfortable with). It would also put us in a new Ward/Branch and we are not sure that is what we want to do. I guess I am just torn by many things and am trying to figure it out. Unfortunately I have let my emotions get the better of me and have been pretty mean to Jason. So I am publicly apologizing to him for not being more like him. I love you Jason and will try harder to slow my emotions and thoughts down to spiritually look at the situation. Thank you for everything you do including: working long hours, commuting about 1 1/2 hours a day, overlooking my downfalls, being my listening ear and eyes on the outside, being the best Dad my children could ever have, and basically putting up with me. I love you!